Warring with the self

 

I was sufficient already,

But then I began to see myself

through others’ eyes,

And my sufficiency crashed,

Something missing in this,

Something in that,

Sadly brooding I sat,

Pampered by fate

as its pessimistic, sulking pet.

 

Long before others,

we judge our own self,

Our own critical eye

cuts, bruises, lacerates, downplays,

devaluates and thumbs us down,

Showing us in poor light,

Long before the outsider’ shears

prune our self-specific, luxuriant sprawl,

we commit self-inflicted wounds,

And around these home-made wounds,

we keep building defensive ramparts,

Whereupon we stand like a hound

and throw catapults

at the imagined enemies around.